Wednesday, September 22, 2010

What I meant to say...(Don't mess with me!)

WIMTS

What I meant to say--It's time folks. Here is my version of What I meant to say:
When I tried to make conversation with the lady next door at the pool (Who BTW is the ONLY person who does not like me over there, she lives with her mother and 4 kids Plus her longtime male friend WHO she does NOT have a relationship with he just watches the kids while she works) : "So, Hi. How ya doing today?" She says, "Fine." and then looks the other way.
What I meant to say to the lady who has a beef with me AND I couldn't care less: "Listen, I HAVE NO idea why you don't like me. I think it is because everyone ELSE likes being around me and for some reason you don't. Why is that? Is it because your son happens to like my daughter? Is it because I sometimes give your son an after school snack (along with my daughter) and talk to the both of them about how their day was? I DON'T know what you problem is lady, but get your panties OUT of a wad and talk to me. You might just find out we have something in common! Do you like having friends?"
When the state calls me back to ask why I haven't reported the income to them (I am receiving Food Stamps to help off set the bills we have) I said, "I did fill out the forms. And sent them back to you the very next day." Lady says with an attitude, "Well we didn't get them. So you didn't send them in. If you would have sent them in you wouldn't have been denied the benefits." 
What I meant to say: "Lady, I don't KNOW who does the mail over there OR files the paperwork but he/she is obviously incompetent. I sent the forms in, What else am I suppose to do? Sheesh. Don't get AFTER me or tell I was unwilling to cooperate WHEN you screwed up and lost the forms." 
And lastly, To all the 11 year old boys that keep coming around the house because you think my 11 year old daughter is cute: What I say: "Hi, Nice to meet ya. You go to the same middle school as her? That's cool." *make nice small talk*
What I meant to say: "I've got MY eye on you. Don't mess with me. If you hurt MY daughter you mess with me too, K? OK? You get me? Good. Very good. You can hang out here ALL you want, you are just NOT taking my daughter elsewhere you understand? She is only 11 by the way..."
And that is WHAT I had to say today. I feel a TON better now. Ahh. Free therapy. Gotta love it. ;) Right? Join UP today!

11 comments:

Unknown said...

Oh yeah me and the lady would be having a long talk while the kids were in school. And I loathe the food stamp office, but luckily I am close enough to drive up there and fill out the forms.. otherwise I would be like you furious

Anonymous said...

It's obviously the neighbor's problem as everyone else lurves you.

I always wanted a daughter but reading this makes me a little relieved that I don't have one. You are just getting started with this boy stuff! You've got YEARS of dealing with it ahead of you.
xoxo

Linda Ramos said...

Oh I love this idea.. thought to join in but my brain is mush and I can't think of anything to write. hmm..

I am not ready for my daughter to get admirers! Actually she already has one but he lives an hour and a half away.. whew.

The Blogging Goddess said...

HA! Love what you SHOULD say to that kid when he comes sniffing around!!

Beth Zimmerman said...

I can't imagine anyone not liking you! And I would greet those boys at the door with a GUN! You're much nicer than me! :)

Pitterle Postings said...

Thanks for making my day!! I sometimes lay in bed at night and dream up the things that I WISH I had the nerve to say! I like your way much better!

Lisa said...

I'm right there witcha on that whole 11 year old boy hanging out at the house. I've got one here right now, btw. And he has a cell phone. And it has a nasty song for the ring tone. And I'm playing Mormon Tabernacle Choir music while they're here, so as to undo the obvious CRAP that's going on in his own home. And yes, I'm judging. That's what moms do.

Sunny said...

Too bad society won't let us say what we really mean. Would cut down on a lot of stuff.

BNM said...

oh them people at the state offices are always assholes! Thats why i always hand deliver lol!

Uh oh keep an eye on them boys!!

Krista said...

Make up a sickly sweet nickname for the boy. That should take care of him.

Rae Ann said...

Bahaha! Love that!

Have you ever considered doing the full RSS feed? I read blogs on a reader and often skip the ones that don't. Just a thought!

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